Podcast

Nitwit Nero gets his shutdown. Is there any starch in the Democrats’ spine? I guess we’ll find out. Does Mullah Moses Mikey have a Grindr profile? One guy says he does and claims to have receipts. JB Pritzker thinks Dimwit Domitian has dementia. 

Fat Man and Little Boy bomb talking at the military’s top brass. Nitwit Nero declares war on American cities. Not kidding. Also today: forgets the name of the House Minority Leader with whom he met only yesterday. Here comes the Shutdown. Cankles Caligula owns it.

We say goodbye to a beloved member of the H.O.R.N Community.

September has been the leanest month in the history of this 20+ year experiment in independent broadcasting. We finished with a $2,260 deficit. Everything helps if you’re able. 

Big Daddy Orange keeps slipping and slurring away. Shutdown looms. Micha calls in with an on-the-ground report from the latest outbreak of 2nd Amendment Freedom. Ag Sec realizes too late that Cankles Caligula may not be such a great negoshurater after all.

Rumors run rampant over DUI hire Whiske Pete Hegseth’s Monday meeting with military leaders. James Comey isn’t spooked by Nitwit Nero’s highlighted pettifogger. The Mouse punches back. 

The ‘roids have taken it up a notch in what’s left of Alex Jones’ soupy excuse for a brain. Comey indicted by one of Cankles Caligula’s former pettifoggers. Somebody may lose a law license. 

Jimmy Kimmel, First Amendment Hero. Vlodomyr Zelensky, Hero Of Freedom. 

Whining! Griping! Mewling! It was all there as Cankles Caligula “addressed” the U.N. The poor, doddering old ass had to climb actual stairs and he didn’t like. Along the way, he also admitted a war crime or two. 

The President can’t pronounce “acetaminophen.” No. Really. Hilarity ensued. Whalehead Deadbear Brainworm-Lamprey is still laughing . . . and laughing like the psychopath he is at all the women he’s going to hurt. He likes hurting women. Nate Silver doesn’t give a damn about people losing healthcare. He says Dems need to talk about import duties, which no MAGAT understands . . . or ever will. 

Jon Stewart shows how it’s done. Cardinal Dolan makes Charles James Kirk an impromptu saint, “an evangelist.” DoJ disappears a damning report. Rob Reiner has an ominous warning. 

No one’s buying ABC’s excuse about canning Jimmy Kimmel any more than anyone is buying Kash Patel’s “Tyler Robinson text messages.” Both are equally absurd. Nitwit Nero gets a very special salute in a royal review.  Melanoma, meanwhile is just . . . weird in her Grim Reaper getup. Was she rehearsing wearing widow’s weeds? CNN provides a mixed bag on Jimmy Kimmel. There was almost some scant journalism. 

Krash Patel has a worse day today than yesterday. Li’l Marco’s brand-spankin’ new replacement makes hersel a MAGAT clown. The toxic Mouse says, “Always Be Capitulating” and cans Jimmy Kimmel over a simple remark. 

Ka$h Patel demonstrates, under oath, in the Senate, just how much an internet troll he truly is. He couldn’t even behave with a MAGAT senator and that’s saying something. Secretary HotMama gets nailed over sliming an American citizen her thugs arrested. White Supremacist Missouri senator gets his klan on. 

Cankles Caligula kills again. Another boat. In another Caribbean location. More dead. Still no actual evidence. More military men with commissions just snapping a salute and ordering extrajudicial murder and piracy on the high seas. Jadey Egg tries (again . . . some more) to be butch, this time with noted mayonnaise slurper Stephen Miller on hand to declare eternal vigilance against anyone who dared criticize Charles James Kirk, whom history, and no one else, will now judge. 

Kirk’s Killer in custody. Good, gawd-lovin’ Republican boy whose daddy taught him to be a killer shot. Matthew 26:52 keeps rearing its head. In other news, Cankles Caligula won’t measure power plant air pollition. Whalehead Deadbear Brainworm-Lamprey plans to terrorize American parents next week with dummied-up vaccine horrors.

The MAGATS’ homicidal spasm continues to grow. Clueless and sunk deep in their cult, they can’t even consider the obvious: that it was a hit and the people with the strongest motives weren’t “librulz.” It was a hit. I’m entirely convinced. Remember: only ONE man in America is immune to prosecution in ordering a murder. 

Raised in church, I was taught to seek wisdom in scriptures. It was right there all the time, in  Jesus’ very own words: Matthew 26:52. 

Our pArTnEr iN pEaS, Israel, decided to slaughter some people in Qatar today. PsychoBibi treated Cankles Caligula, impotent and dying as he is, like the pathetic lame duck he is. In the meantime, Epstein’s ghost is rattling alllll the chains and (too) slowly crushing his mind’s pathetic remnants. 

Whatever shall we do about this MAGAT-on-MAGAT violence? Me, I’d pop some popcorn and yell, “C’mon! Let’s you an’ him duke it out!” Cankles Caligula endorses domestic violence. His “christian” audience applauds. John Roberts hacks away at what remains to anything resembling neutrality at SCOTUS.

The sixth letter o’ the alphabet is still dead on my keyboard. 

That’s OK. Whalehead Deadbear Brainworm-Lamprey’s entire mind is a wreck. 

Cankles Caligula prepares to invade Chicago. Whalehead Deadbear Brainworm-Lamprey lies like a rug to the Senate.