Category: Full Shows

Another day in the American Abbatoir. Another day spinning the NRA’s Roulette Wheel Of 2A Feeeedummm. And nothing will happen till it happens again and nothing will happen till it happens again ad infinitum ad nauseam.

The House has a new Mullah, er, Speaker. 

Well. On this evening, with the world going to pot around us, Lo! and Behold! A tiny little non-commercial, non-capitalist broadcast turned 18. “18, 18, 18”. 

To do ANYTHING for eighteen years is somewhat remarkable. To talk to the world that long is a gift. I have sat here in West Virginia and learned SO much. Everyone who has ever called has become a friend. Like Bob Marley said, “Good friends we’ve had, good friends we’ve lost  along the way. . . “

I wish you could know how humbling my life is! To be trusted with information. To never mislead. And to have a damned giggle. 

I love my community!

The Mayhem In the House continues, and it’s only getting dumber. Racist Bannon and Benny “Dry Wife” Shapiro are running opposite grifts. MAGAT Foreign Relations chair admits this is all a shutdown. Joyce Vance agrees with moi as to why Judge Chutkan hasn’t dropped a rock yet on Nitwit Nero. 

If Gym dies anymore, it’s gonna get religious. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Remember until the DAY you DIE how the people you thouoght were your friends HATED you.

For once, the MAGATS get the thorns. Jim “Jacket Off” Jordan has a “Hamlet,” moment, indecisive. To run or not to run. Gee. I hope it doesn’t hurt too little.

Deadly serious and at the same time hilariously incompetent. Jim “Jacket Off” Jordan’s even lousier very bad day. 

Jim “Jacket Off” Jordan had a really rotten afternoon. Good. Most excellent. Twenty GOPpers said, “Aw, HELL, no!” to the very idea of him being Speaker and chaos ensued. Reminder: they may not even want a speaker. What they want is a shutdown. Meanwhile, Nitwit Nero tests his gag order. 

When is a “gag order” not a gag order? When it’s applied to Nitwit Nero. “Gag” has both a specific and a colloquial meaning, as in, “joke.” Bets on what it means in this context? Hate comes home in the Chicago suburbs. 

More of the same, unfortunately. But other madness, as well. George Anthony Devolder James Knox Polk Santos has a meltdown in a House office building (looks like Longworth). Jim “Jacket Off” Jordan inches toward a Speakership as media ask more questions about the young men whose rapes he ignored. Joe-To-the-Manchin-Born has polling problems. 

Really: Pooty’s fingerprints are all over Hamas. Just the same, the MAGATS want to drink Iranian blood. Regardless, the MAGATS can’t get their act together to pick a speaker. Meanwhile, Michele Batshit Crazy Bachman knows exactly why the attack happened. Get the hockey puck. Counsel for the Parking Garage breathes a sigh of relief. A case study of just how screwed up health insurance is in America. 

Day Two of That Thing I Hate To Talk About. But talk we do. And it turns out we’re pretty solid. Condemning Hamas takes no effort. Defining the parameters of peace is complicated. 

PsychoBibi’s chickens come home to roost. The Middle East abbatoir is once more open for business. Naturally, MAGATS make everything worse. But Craven McCarthy sees an opening . . . 

Faux wants a televised Speaker Circus. That didn’t play so well with several of the clowns. Nitwit Nero loses again. Dystopia: teenage West Virginians partying in toxic waste. A little girl in Utah eloquently pleads for her own existence. The Chesebro gets Python’d. 

Extra long edition.

If you look up “smarmy” in any dictionary of the English language, you will find a photo of the visage of Joe-To-the-Manchin-Born. JFC! He’s even worse when he’s playing coy. I just wish folks like Joe Scarborough could learn and internalize Roxanne’s First Law Of Manchins: “No One Named Manchin EVER Does Anything That Doesn’t Benefit Someone Named Manchin.”  Meanwhile . . . MAGATS contemplate “Speaker Trump” and I contemplate the End of Civilization. Also: I spoiler a really fun Florida crime novel from the late-90s (back when books were things-in-hand).

Jesus is punking MAGATS in the House. Nazi fitness gymbros support mayoral candidate in Franklin, TN. Nitwit Nero is literally grunting and groaning in the courtroom. AOC takes MAGATS to Schoolhouse Rock. We have a ringside seat to a trainwreck.

It doesn’t get much more Titanic than this. MAGATS sink their own Speaker in a historic, hysteric fit of pique.  Kevvers ain’t gettin’ that jar back . . . and blames . . . Democrats? Nitwit Nero gets fitted with a smallish gag in Manhattan after doxing Justice Engoron’s clerk. Counsel For the Parking Garage has a worried look on her face. MAGAT bloodlust on bold display. 

The circus goes to 11. Tangerine Tiberius shows up for court in Manhattan and gives us a preview of what months of sitting through criminal trials will do to him. HINT: there’s a meltdown for the ages coming. Meanwhile, Marge’s drag queen bf declares that liberal women are “ugly.” It defintely sucks to be Craven McCarthy these days and I’m not upset about that. Saving his miserable hide may give decent people a chance to keep the MAGATS from hanging Ukraine out to dry and getting a fully funded government (till we do this again next year). Fappy bails on a case that cut a little to close to home. 

“The center will not hold.” 

Creepy how poetry actually works. 

 

This time, all the thorns are in the sides of House MAGATS. Wow! What a terrible couple of days these have been for them! And the Shadenfreude is thicker than a Black Forest fog! Virginia Democrat Gerry Conollly unveils some mad trolling skills. Nitwit Nero decides to to go to Federal Court in Georgia. A MAGAT tells fellow MAGAT Matt “Creep” Gaetz to “F off.” The wheels: they are wobbling. Chris Christie accuses Dr. Jill Biden of prostitution. Misogynist MAGATS (I know: redundant) are running away from themselves.